Finding the Courage to Give

"It's not about me. It's about the people in my book. They're the ones with the inspiring stories," Jackie Waldman told us when we met. And we agree with her--partly. The stories in her five books describe people who have gotten past their own fear and disappointment in what life has dealt them to bring joy and good to others.  We have two points of disagreement. First, her own story is inspiring. And without Jackie having the dream and taking the initiative, the stories of many people in her books would never be known.

Jackie married her high school sweetheart, had three children, and her own business. She was busy and under a fair amount of stress, but when she began to experience tingling around her waist, she assumed it was related to the back surgery she'd had a few years before.  When the numbness spread to her toes, she went to the doctor and was eventually diagnosed with MS. After steroids and chemo to hold back the damage, she regained the feeling in her legs and most of her strength. She was left with daily overwhelming exhaustion that required naps and rest. No bargaining for a few hours more.

Throughout her period of recovery, while learning to accept the limits she now had on her formerly athletic body, she spent time with a friend, Dee whose calm peacefulness helped soothe the anger and fear that had come with the MS diagnosis. The two of them watched Schindler's List together and left the theater talking about how one person could affect so many lives.

As they talked about the power of good, they came upon the idea of creating a celebration of kindness in Dallas as part of the National Random Acts of Kindness Month. Their Dallas Kindness Week featured Rosa Parks, Dennis Weaver, and Martin Luther King III speaking at schools, interfaith services, and kindness rallies. When kindness week ended, Jackie wanted the good feelings to continue and she became a docent at the Dallas Memorial Center for Holocaust Studies. She volunteered more and more and said yes to anyone who invited her to be involved in their organizations.

Her present demeanor of calm acceptance took time she says. Along the way she learned that "the spirit is what has to heal, not the legs." She had to find a "new normal" that included time every day to rest, exercise, eat well, and help others

One morning she woke up and told her husband that she knew what she had to do. She was going to write a book about people who had suffered physical or emotional pain and had moved past their own suffering to help others. For her first book, The Courage to Give, she interviewed 30 people with stories of sorrow and, ultimately, hope. The day after her book was published; she received a call from Oprah Winfrey's staff asking her to be on the show. Within two days of her being on the show 7500 people signed up with a charity on a website Jackie mentioned on the show, www.volunteermatch.com.  Of course we had to ask....Jackie told us that the "thought of being on Oprah was exciting, scary, and surreal. Being with her was quite different. She makes guests feel so comfortable. She and I chatted during commercial breaks about the courage to give, simple things we can all do.  She’s so real!" Jackie obviously made a good impression too because she was invited to appear on the show a second time.

Jackie continues to spread her stories of inspiration and hope: touring 150 cities over a four year period doing radio, local TV, and newspaper interviews, writing four more books that have touched people's lives, Teens with the Courage to Give; America, September 11: The Courage to Give; Teachers with the Courage to Give, and People with MS with the Courage to Give. LINK to reviews of Jackie's books

Her advice to people newly diagnosed with MS or any other life changing concern is to talk to someone with the same issue who is doing well. National Organizations have websites that help link people. Surround yourself with good support. And know that the new normal can be okay.

When asked what the good news is about what has happened to her, Jackie says she's learned how to think of others. She also says she's a calmer, more peaceful person.  Along the way she says maybe someone else with a problem has been inspired. We believe there's no question that people have been inspired by her life, her spirit, and her work.  We were moved by our interview with her and greatly affected by the stories in her books.

Read more about Jackie on her website, www.couragetogive.com.